Dear God,
Where do I start? I have so much to say, ask, and tell you.
My faith. God, I’m sorry for not always praying at night like how I used to. I remember always making it a priority to pray before I go to sleep. I’d thank you for everything you’ve blessed me with and always ask for your guidance. Now what do I do? I get lazy. Now I’m saying, “I’ll pray later. Later.. I promise.” to myself. That later doesn’t always come. I just fall asleep. I’m really sorry God. I feel like I only talk to You when I’m in desperate need for help. I know You still love me no matter what and always know what’s going on in my life, but please help me to not be lazy especially when it comes to praying. Please strengthen my faith in You.
My family. God, it’s so hard to have patience with my parents sometimes! I know that’s a normal teenage thing but it kills me. I love my parents so much. And they probably don’t even believe me when I say that cause of the way I act. -_- Ahh. God, I really ask for your help. Please help me to respect them more. I don’t wanna be a bitch to them cause no matter what they’re always gonna be my parents. I’m really thankful God. I really am. I have a good relationship with my mom but sometimes.. it’s just eh. You know. And with my dad, I have a good relationship too a handful of times. But I know my relationship with my parents can be better. Please help me improve on being the daughter they deserve. God, I ask that my sister and I find that sister-best-friend bond again. Like sometimes we do have those deep talks and whatnot, but I wish that we had more those. She’s turning 18 next week and I ask that You help me make it a great birthday for her. And please God, help her pass her permit test when she retakes it on Wednesday. Lol, she almost had it the first time. But anyway, the second time will be better right? Help her make her last six weeks of high school great. I can’t believe she’s growing up. Omg. And when she’s off to CSM, help her there too. Oh, and God.. please.. like seriously please.. help her be a little bit more responsible. Thank you for blessing me with an older sister who I can trust with a lot of things. God, thank you for my grandparents. I love my grandmas and grandpas a lot. Please help them have continue having that strength to live and be happy. Please help me to respect them too. And to the rest of my family, to all my aunties, uncles, cousins, relatives, etc. please continue watching over them. Thank you for blessing me with a bunch of people I really love.
My friends. I feel like I’m drifting away from many of them. But I know it’s kind of my fault. I’ve been going through a tough time for months and I’m kinda.. pushing them away. I don’t know. I just feel like they don’t really understand and I’d rather just be alone. Eh. But I know no matter what, they got my back and I got theirs. God, I miss being close with them. Please help me to open up to them when the time’s right. Please watch over each and every one of them. Thank you for blessing me with all my friends. They’re all special to me and they all have a place in my heart.
Him. Okay.. this is gonna be hard but I’m gonna do this anyway. First and foremost, thank you so much for putting him in my life. Seriously. Next week is going to be a year of knowing him.. and.. I don’t know how that’s gonna be like. But anyway, it’s been almost 4 months, God. I know what I should be doing, but I’m not doing that. Well, I guess I’m getting somewhat better? Ah. God, you know that thought I’ve been having in my head. “Should we still be in each other’s lives?” That thought. It hurts thinking about that cause we promised to be friends no matter what. I’m lost and confused. We haven’t talked in over a week and I’m okay with that. But God, please watch over him and help him out. I still care about him even if it’s starting to look like I don’t. Yeah.. I have so much more to say about this. *To be continued.
Myself. God, I’m sorry for sometimes taking my life for granted. I’m sorry for not being that thankful for what you’ve blessed me with. I’m sorry for sometimes being so negative and whatnot. You’ve seen how much I’ve changed ever since.. 4 months ago happened. It really affected me. But I don’t want it to take over my whole life. Please help me get myself back on track with the things I should be doing. I mean like, I’ve matured in many ways. But on the other hand, I’ve been kinda not myself in many ways. Hmm. Yeah.. I’m really lost, God. -_- Please help and guide me throughout my life. Please help me with school and to improve in dance. Thank you for never leaving my side and never changing.
I can go on and on about everything but I guess I’ll stop here for now.
<3CMLC