dear god,

i feel like such a hypocrite. here i am, a leader of my youth group, yet i engage in everything we preach not to do. sex, drugs, alcohol—everything. i stand at our meetings every week and talk about how we should never turn to these things, to not give in to peer pressure. but here i am, doing all of those anytime i feel like it.

i feel like such a disgrace.
i’ve fallen from your grace.

people always praise me for being such a good role model, but i’m so far from it. i’m not the person everyone thinks i am, i’m the person i want them to think i am.

i need to come back to your path but i feel as if i’ve strayed too far already. please, give me the strength to resist temptation.

i don’t want to be this girl anymore.