I miss you so much. I feel like I’m getting weaker and weaker every day. I feel sooo distant from you compared to what I used to have with you. And that petrifies me and breaks my heart more than anything could. Jesus, I have been asking you over and over again to enter my heart and reawaken me. Dwell in my heart. Let your voice resonate in my voice God. I need you so much. I am desperate for you. Day by day I’m blending back into this world and allowing it to steal the best of me. The best of me that should be saved for you.

I am so sorry God. I am so sorry that my heart has forgotten you and my eyes have been shutting on the treasures you have for me, not just saved up in heaven, but now.

I just don’t feel anything God. And I want to so much. I don’t want to lose you. I feel like my heart has been numbed and nothing is warming it up and bringing back its feeling. I NEED YOU TO SHAKE ME.

I want to be with you again. Please. Just run back into my life. You know how much I need you. I’m letting you in. Just please… enter. And don’t leave me, ever. I can’t handle it.